Where the bleep is it?

I broke down and ordered a new Ipod. I used to have a shuffle but I gave that to my son because I need/want to listen to books on the Ipod and well, it is a little difficult with the Ipod shuffle. I was sad to give up the little green machine but the smile on my son's face made it worth while to be without my music for a few days. Well, it's actually been more than a few days and WHERE IS MY IPOD NANO? I need my music back. I need this little machine so I can listen to this:

This book has changed my life. Really. I am not one to read the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" type books which this author has written but I DO have to say that this particular book is AWESOME! It has principles of success from many different business people, successful people who have made their lives incredible. I have read this book several times and now I need to "hear" it so it becomes my own language. Now all I need is my new Ipod. It better be here tomorrow...

Be still my bleeding heart.

This a peek at some graphics I have been working on these past few months. I'd love to show you the logo and web site but I think I have to wait for the legal stuff to come in first. It is such a fun company, I'll post some of it as soon as I get the go a head.

Chomping at the bit right now for my paintings. I have a little bit of the road block again. I have these ideas, but they are not transferring quite like I want them to. This is my lesson in waiting for the inspiration, it always comes but with it's own schedule. Letting go and waiting for the good stuff. This I am learning over and over and over again.

Went to see a play today with my son's class at Balboa Park. The Jr. Theatre puts on productions there and the few that I have seen have been quite impressive. The one we saw today was Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. These kids are talented I tell you!

Oh my heart bleeds right now. Bleeds with emotions I am unable to list but I'll try a few off the top of my head. Amazement. Joy. Jealousy. Wonder. Curiosity. Why these emotions you ask? I just found this blog with a list of the top 100 artists on Etsy. All these talented artists in one sitting. They all are so talented and just dazzling to look at, go take a peek. I dare you!

Wednesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful to be a part of a school for my son that not only feeds his mind but feeds his soul as well.

Just like old times.

Tuesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful to have my son home today, just a day of bonding and reading. It was just like old times. Great day!

Illustration Friday_Wrinkles

Helen thought that flat ironing her face was not such a bad trade off since she had quite a few wrinkles. It could be done to hair, why not skin? Little did she know her head looked rather large and flat. Maybe next time she should just embrace those wrinkles, she has certainly earned them!

And she found the pearl!

I had someone email me and wonder how/why I call my blog "Life Without Novacaine." I've always had a meaning behind it but I've never been asked, so this was a challenge to verbalize something that made so much sense to me in my mind. Alone under the covers of my own mind, I picked the name "life without novacaine" because quite a few months ago I sort of had an afflatus of some sort. I realized that I was not living up to my potential, maybe just sort of skirting by on life. Living on the edges so to speak, not in the middle where all the meat is but out in the soft, looser edges, living like I had novacaine in my brain. Not drugged, because I don't do drugs and rarely drink, but not challenging myself and creating an artful life that inspired me. So, I changed everything, my eating, my exercise, my way of speaking, what I chose to read, etc., basically living a "life without novacaine." There is nothing there to hide behind or deaden the pain of life. I am right there in the middle now, mixing it up and loving life. Life just the way I like it. Not always easy, not always painless but real, messy, joyful life. There. No novacaine to be found here.

So this illustration is for Tash the Oysterblogger who is so clever in her writing and has lovely photos of her family, because she is the one who asked. Thanks for asking about the novacaine!

Monday Gratitude:
I am so grateful for the generosity of family and friends who support me in raising money for the Breast Cancer Walk I am doing in October. Thank you!!

Supercalafragilistic...expealidocious!

This weekend I was in LA visiting my best friend and today we went to UCLA for the 13th annual Festival of Books.

Yes, in the 100 degree heat, there was a festival of authors, publishers, books, food, etc. on the campus of beautiful UCLA. I went in search of info for publishing my book ideas and also to meet some favorite authors. You'll never guess who was there! Julie Andrews! In the flesh. Of course I didn't get close enough to actually see her but being graced by the thought of her presence was quite enough. There we so many people there, obviously the heat wave didn't keep author stalkers such as myself away. I was so very glad to have my best friend there by my side because for some reason, my mind went blank and my ability to speak to anyone was gone. Simply gone. I think the idea of talking to someone about my ideas or suggestions on how to make them happen made me freeze up on the spot. I was afraid. Plain and simple, I was afraid. Afraid of being rejected. So my friend, who will talk to anyone, spoke for me. Ack. I can't have that. There is no room for that kind of fear, not no more and not no how!

Sunday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a friendship that is like no other.

I'll walk for a cure.

I am doing the 2 day Breast Cancer walk. It is a marathon one day and half a marathon the next. The best part is (besides raising money for breast cancer) is that I am doing it in NEW YORK CITY! I can't wait. AND I get to spend the night right in Central Park! Yes, I'll be in a tent and I'm not that excited about that idea but HELLO, I'll be right there in the park all night long!! I heart that city so much and would LOVE to live there. I haven't been to NYC for many years so I am really looking forward to this trip. Only 162 days left to go! Better get walkin'!

Saturday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a chance to hang out with my best friend in LA this weekend.

Birthday Smash.

Birthday night last night! We took our son and some family friends out to dinner and my boy chose Dave & Busters (well actually he chose Chuck E Cheese but I nixed that idea immediately!) for his birthday place for food, fun and games. OK, at least I can have a somewhat decent meal and a cocktail so Dave & Busters it was (because after all it really is about the adults now too.) After our meal, we went off to play a few video games and carnival type games for tickets to redeem later for small plastic merchandise. My boy was racking up the tickets, a smile plastered on his face with thoughts of collecting some sort of fare at the end. This is what he chose as his prize.

I KNOW! Just what we needed, a large stuffed bright pink Patrick from Spongebob dressed in Western wear! It will fit in nicely with the large stuffed Beluga whale, the sock monkey, an assortment of bears, the Pez collection, bins and bins of Legos, shelves and shelves of books and the 863 football cards. Boys will be boys.

Happy Birthday little bear!

Happy Birthday my love! You are seven years old today, my where did those years go? Here's to wishing you a fabulous birthday and a great new year!

Friday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for the playfulness and bits of fun that come wrapped up in a seven year old.

It's birthday time in about 5 hours.

Tomorrow is my son's birthday. We try to make birthday's fun around here because it's your one day that is all your own. Every year I write out a long birthday card/letter to my son and recap the past year and how much he means to me and then I mail it to our house. BUT I don't let him read it. I've collected them all, all seven of them so far, and save them in a special box. When he turns 18 I'll let him have at it, because then he'll be able to appreciate all the words and passage of time. At least I hope he does. I can't wait!

Today my sister and I hosted an Ice Cream Social at our kid's school as a fundraiser for the PTO. I was sort of dreading it because I just imagined a sea of kids crashing down upon us and ice cream, chocolate sauce and sprinkles would be flying everywhere. It turned out to be quite fun and all the kids were really mild mannered and polite. We raised a good amount of money and I'm actually thinking we should do another one! Hooray CTCS!

Thursday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful to be surprised with a gem of niceness when I'm least expecting it.

Teva Bones.

Teva. So sweet. This sweet face is one I am so glad to come home to every day and night. She is so forgiving of us being gone all day and not showering her with attention every moment. When she does need a bit of love she lets us know but most of the time she is just glad to be around us. So sweet and so forgiving. Love her.

Tick tock.

Sometimes I wish there were more hours in a day. The days seem to go by so quickly, time speeding by so fast I can only feel the wind from it racing past. I'd love to capture a few moments in life and make them stand still, just every now and then. Is that so much to ask? I feel like Alice sliding down the Rabbit Hole these past few days.

Wednesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for the moments I am present and aware of it's glory.

One tomato, two tomato, 3 tomato, 4.

I have these tomato plants sitting on my deck, they've been there for about a week and I just haven't had the time or desire to go plant them. Not sure what my problem is. I LIKE to plant in my garden. I have been playing a nasty little game with them too while they sit there and wait. I let them dry out a bit and then water them so they perk back up. I suppose my mind just isn't on my yard right now but those little plants better beware because I will be ready very soon and then they'll be sorry. Or happy. One of the two.

Tuesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a nice breezy day to go for a long walk.

Forgiving.

This is my newest painting in my Inspired series. Ah, forgiveness. That's a hard one to swallow if there is someone you have yet to forgive. Have you ever had an issue with someone and held on tight to that grievance with white knuckles, never to let go? I have. I let something eat at me for a very long time and then one day it came to me. I was the only one suffering. My dislike was not effecting this person in the least and I was harboring a dangerous pit of anger that was really going to do me in. So, I decided to just forgive and get over it. Yes, I built a bridge and crossed it. Just like that. It felt so good to let it go and do you know what? That very person I was so disliking became disturbed that I wasn't bothered by them anymore. It then became that person's problem and never to be mine again. Man, that felt good. SO GOOD! There is freedom in forgiveness and it really is a gift you give yourself!

Monday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful to have finished with another painting and have two more in the making.

Fashion Mogul.

Theo was looking for a new fashion statement, something bold yet uplifting. This however, was not quite what he was thinking of. Darn those vet people! He only went in for a bath and came out missing a few body parts and sporting a new Elizabethian collar. Poor Theo.

Sunday Gratitude:
I am so grateful for the sun that shines and a nice cool breeze.

Illustration Friday_Primitive

So very primitive in every way, except of course for the dinner he will not hunt and kill and roast over a fire by his cave.

Yo-yo. Ya-ya.

OK, ok just look how cute this little number is! I made some little fabric circles called yo-yos and stitched them onto a sweater for someone special (can't tell you who yet just in case she reads this before she gets her mail!) I found the idea in a magazine and thought "Hmmm, how cute is that?" Well, very cute and gosh darn easy peasy. Must make more.

Saturday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a whole gaggle of friends to be off to a dinner party with tonight!

Dirty rotten characters.

I bring my paint stained hands to my computer to make this post. This illo is of a character I am contemplating for my children's book I am writing. My deadline is coming up so I need to get cracking on this. She looks so rotten, I don't think she'll be in my book anytime soon but maybe I could send her out for some ice cream later.

Friday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for everything to be in alignment at this particular moment.

Orange, orange and more orange.

Most people say "UCK" when they see these. I say "YUM!" Why? Why of course for the marshmallow-y goodness all wrapped up as a peanut and named after a circus. How could that possibly NOT be fun? (Also I am a closet "carney," but don't tell anybody!)

After the struggle.

For some odd reason, I have been struggling with a creative block on my paintings. I knew exactly what I wanted in my mind but have been unable to make the connection from my brain, through my arm, to the end of my paint brush. Well, today I was body slammed with the idea of how to make that exact thing happen. While I was driving it all came at once. It seems that letting go is the thing that works for me as I had to let go of my frustration of being at a standstill. Let go of the fear that my ideas weren't going to come to fruition and I would fail. Let go. Just let go. So here it is. My painting that has been lurking around in my brain has transferred onto canvas pretty much exactly how I saw it inside my head. My little word of eight letters, motivate, has become my friend again. I can't wait to get started on the other twenty blank canvases I have hovering around my studio!



My jewelry designer friend had another party at her house this evening. She was selling her jewels and had a few other vendors selling their goods as well. There was a makeup artist from Trish McEvoy tonight who did a little make over on me, letting me go back to my house all dewy and fresh looking. I think I need a professional make up artist all the time! Who doesn't want to look all glowy and sparkly? I should have made plans to go do something after the party instead of just coming home and washing it all off while I climb into my flannel pj's and settle into the couch to read while sipping tea. Boy, I lead an exciting life!

Thursday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for my long walk today. I really needed that!

Blast from the past.

I watched a movie last night called "Forget Paris" with Billy Crystal and Debra Winger. Many, many years ago I had seen this and my sister made me watch again because it is just SO FUNNY! I forgot what a great film it is. I am adding to my favorites list.

Speaking of closet resurrections, I remembered a book I read a very, very long time ago called "Borrowed Time" by Paul Monette. He is a wonderful author and I have a collection of poems from him that are incredible. I MUST read "Borrowed Time" again. I remember it really moved me when I read it and I am curious if I'll have the same reaction since almost twenty years have passed. I'm going to pick it up tomorrow. Funny, things we pull out from the closets of the past!

We all scream for ice cream!

The flower fields were awesome today! Perfect, cool day with a nice ocean breeze, tossing the round heads of the flowers ever so lightly. Even the kids were great today. It was a good time all the way around. I hate to admit this but I usually don't look forward to class field trips due to the few unruly kids that can be a bit challenging. I wish so badly I wasn't like that. I wish so badly I could handle a car load full of kids and enjoy their silliness instead of feeling my shoulders creep slowly towards my ears and my fingers grip the steering wheel tighter and tighter with each squealing voice. I am noise sensitive. Always have been but only the past couple years have I been able to realize the problem. I suppose that is why I only have one child. A quiet, mild mannered child. Someone knew that's all I could handle and still be a nice, solid, supportive parent at the same time! Yes, I'll take my child of one with an ear to ear grin and revel in his amiable ways.

I was so inspired by the flower fields today, I purchased a nice bouquet of Gerbra daisies just for me. They really make me smile.

I am so excited about a new project I discussed with my client today. Another children's book! Yippeee! Now I really, really better get busy!

Wednesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for another lovely day.

A day full of art.

This is a new project I worked on with my sister. I'll post later what this is all about.



Here is a website I am working on for a jewelry designer. It'll be up and running in a few days.

Fields of flowers.

Tomorrow, my son has a field trip to the Carlsbad Flower Fields where there are acres of ranunculus flowers. I am driving a car full of kids to this place. I hope I survive the trip so I can enjoy all the beauty!

Tuesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a day full of projects and web design.

What was I thinking?

This is my brain. It is the size of a pea. It has left the safety of home to wander around aimlessly. I have been working on my taxes for about twelve hours today. WHAT WAS I THINKING? Why did I think I could do a better job than an expert in the field? Why oh why did I (we) procrastinate until the very last minute? Why did I think I could even get this done in one day? Yup. My brain is a pea and will be until sometime tomorrow.

Monday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for this very looong day to be ending and a new one just out on the horizon.

Outside my little world.

Someone said recently that we are considered a privileged and wealthy country. I completely agree with that statement. However, living in San Diego or Southern California for that matter, it is so easy to become self absorbed and complacent with our luxurious lifestyle we are allowed to live. We are allowed to live this lifestyle because quite frankly we can. We can because who is going to stop us? Things just keep becoming more and more convenient, vendors and manufacturers entice us with an easy way of living. We don't see the other side of the world, the other side of the tracks where people don't have food and shelter let alone a car or schooling for their children. I'd like my child to see this other side. I just don't know how to make it available to him just yet.

I suppose I was letting my mind run with these thoughts today as I was driving from a photo shoot I helped art direct and was on my way to the Sheraton Hotel to meet family and friends by the pool. The pool that is available for a monthly fee to use at your leisure. A pool that you can lounge around, sipping a cool drink and gabbing with your friends because it was too hot just sitting at home. A pool we can use anytime. How fortunate is this society to be able to spend a Sunday afternoon by the pool. And I am one of them. I don't want to change my pool usage, I quite enjoy it. But I do want to change how easy it is to drive through a Starbucks and pick up take out for dinner and if something breaks we just go out and replace it. I'd like to let my child see that life isn't always so easy.

There is an organization I heard about that goes down to Mexico to build homes for people and you can take your kids with you to help. There is a ladle program at my son's school where they feed the homeless. There are people everywhere, when you look around, that need a helping hand. Maybe I can start small and move to the bigger things. Being that he is only six, starting small would make a grandiose impression I believe.

Now, just how to break my Starbucks habit and I'll be on my way!

Sunday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for some really kind words, just when I need them the most.

Hot Pockets.

Today was a very, very hot day here in San Diego. We are experiencing a heat wave and man is it warm. Went to Mission Bay today and I swear it could have been the fourth of July with all the people swarming about. Geez, I guess I don't get out much!

This little duck sure thought it was hot today and is ready for a little swim.

Last night and today I was at a conference with my girlfriends, my peeps. We went to see Beth Moore at San Diego Cox Arena with about 10,000 other San Diegans. Have you ever experienced such a beautiful moment when someone was singing or talking and you were so completely overwhelmed that every single little tiny hair on your body stood up on end? Stood up at attention. A moment in time that was so captivating and moving that your whole body gave into that moment, giving every ounce of attention and intent. Well, that happened to me this weekend at this conference. I was aware of every single hair standing up on end while someone was singing. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. All I could do was stop and stare. And that my friends doesn't happen very often. The conference was amazing yet very emotionally draining. I can't wait to have my head hit the pillow tonight!

Saturday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a new Kabob restaurant my friend turned me on to. Yummy!

Inspired.

Inspiration can come from anywhere. Sometimes we look for it, sometimes it just comes. However it comes, half the battle is being open and ready for it. Closing upon a lack luster week of inspiration, I am ready for it. And tonight, it hit me. Like a block of cement. It side swiped me, nearly taking off my head.

Friday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for messages, direct and indirect.

From start to end.

Hmmmm. Having one of the those days that started out quite nicely but seems to be ending with a sour taste in my mouth. The day actually started spiraling downhill right around noon and didn't seem to slow down until right now at this exact moment. This exact moment when I get to make my daily post and here I show up with nothing. Or not much anyway. I think this is the evening to make it an early bed time!

My word with eight little letters, motivate, has been playing me lately. It seems I have misplaced my motivation ever since I came back from Colorado this past weekend. I am confident she will come back to me, this word that is my inspiring word for 2008. Since I have re-organized my studio/office, I bet she is hiding under a stack of papers or is behind a bookshelf. I must look a bit harder. Or maybe I should stop looking and let her come to me. Could be another lesson in letting go! Oh my, thank God tomorrow is another day!

Thursday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for my long and well needed walk this morning.

Illustration Friday_Save

Poor Buddy. If only he could remember where he liked to save his treats, he'd be in doggy heaven right now.

Keep Calm.

This is an inspiration poster I made for my sister. Her life is very, um how do I say this kindly ... emotionally charged. When there is a lot of tumultuous energy going on around you, it is easy to get caught up in the swirl of it all. She is working on remaining calm yet focused. So, these words really speak to her. And me as well. Maybe I need one to hang up at my house...

My boy has strep throat. I don't know if I have ever had that but I am sure it is very uncomfortable due to all the complaining going on around here for the past few days. I took him to the doctor today as he has been home for five days with a very high fever and this is where we found out about the strep. It looks like he'll be home for a bit so I am hoping to get a lot of work and movie watching done around here. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic and I believe this is the first time he has ever had to take one. So when I went to get it filled, I was charged $110!! What? What about all the money we pay every month for insurance? I thought things like this were supposed to be covered. OK, maybe not completely covered but I was taken by surprise. My insurance bites. That's all I have to say.

OK, my painting. I started one today. Yipee for me.

Wednesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for my health and my green drink that keeps my health close by.

It's graduation time!

Here is an invitation I created for a new client for a graduation party. It is refreshing to work on such a fun subject, all the newness of unspoken opportunities just waiting around the bend. Remember feeling like jumping straight up in the air upon high school graduation? I do. I think I even did just that. Even at college graduation I think I jumped straight up into the air. I distinctly remember that feeling of accomplishment!

Yikes, exposed once again.

Yet another day goes by with an empty canvas perched upon my easel, beckoning me to come close and dress it's treacherous nakedness. It seems I am unable to cooperate. I am frozen and unyielding in my little busy life with so many things to do EXCEPT paint, the ONE thing I want to do more than anything else. Here I sit, exposing my truth so I can hand it off and be gone with it already. I believe my brain is a bit frizzled with a candy coated sugar glaze from my poor eating over the past week. I am not sure what else could be the problem. I am sure it is not the household that is sick with the flu right now, or the clean and orderly office, or the looming mound of paper work I must shuffle through before the 15th. Whatever it is, tomorrow is a new day and that canvas is going to meet the end of my paint brush. It is, it is, it is. Truth exposed.

Tuesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for spending a day with my son, keeping him home from school and taking care of his sick little being. I am grateful to have the time with him.

Discover yourself.

Well, didn't get the canvas up today, BUT I did reorganize my office. I bought new cabinets and a work table so I can get all my art supplies in one area. I have been needing to make my office/spare bedroom into more of an inspiring space and that is just what I did. I took out the extra bed (sorry to my infrequent guests for that!) and set up a painting area with room to breathe. My paints are now in the house and not in my jumbled laundry room collecting dust. That is huge for me because now I will not have any more excuses. I am not making it easy for myself to slip back into my procrastinating jumpsuit and find pockets full of reasons to justify why I am not making my dreams happen. All I have to do is face is my fear then I'll be riding that creative train! Ha! What fear? Gulp.

My sister finally put her fabulous belt buckles on Etsy. They are so fun and sparkly, to take a look and be dazzled! You can find them here.

Monday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for my sister who helped me select and assemble my new cabinets for my office.

Dominate.

It is so good to be back and feeling inspired. Tomorrow I am going to spend some time in front of a canvas and try out a few new ideas. But tonight, I am just going to go to bed and think about fuzzy puppies and underground trains in my sleep. Good night.

Sunday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a clear head and a few good books.

It's good to be home.

Having a scratchy throat from travel and a weary head from lack of sleep, it is good to be home. I really like to travel and see different places but one of the highlights of leaving town is always coming back home. It is a place to not only hang my hat and take off my shoes but a place to untie the strings around my heart.

Man was it hard to leave Denver today. My cousins drove me to the airport and saying goodbye was much harder than I thought it was going to be. I have grown quite attached to them and have grown accustomed to the patterns in their lives this past week. I shared so many touching memories with my cousin Kathy, she truly is an inspiration with her positive attitude and "roll with the punches" attitude. We had some great laughs along with some good cries and in depth talks about the meanings of our lives. I miss them already.

Friday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful to have a young cousin who just turned 21 to go out on the town with!

Saturday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for my little family of three to come home to.

Precious struck twice.

Wow. Sitting in the Denver airport, waiting for my flight to San Diego, you'll never guess who strolls up to the United Airlines counter. It was the same man from my arriving flight who called "Precious" on his cell phone! Well, I couldn't let THAT one slip by as I was thinking about the sweetness of that kind man calling someone "Precious", so I walked right up to him and introduced myself and asked him who this "Precious" really was. He was so kind as not to be taken back my brazen inquiring and he told me she was his wife. HIS WIFE. How cute is that? I love that this man finds his wife so endearing that he refers to her as "Precious." LOVE that, not exactly sure why, but I do. In a sickeningly sweet way.

And it snows in April!

Woke up today to a light dusting of snow across the rolling hills. It quickly went away as the weather warmed up, but by the afternoon there was a snow storm and everything, I mean everything was covered with a blanket of white. I was so happy. I ran outside and took photos of everything I could and I am sure my cousin's neighbors locked their doors in case the crazy camera lady was going to come up and knock.

Being a caretaker is hard work. Being a family member of a sick loved one is hard work. BUT being the one riddled with an unknown illness is the hardest work of all. We are working very hard here in Colorado. Big things are being thrown this way right now but there are small glimmers of hope every once in a while. A cool, quick breeze of hope whispers by when we are choking by the still, stale air. Two steps forward, one step back as they say. (Who is they by the way, I really need to have a talk with "them.")

Wednesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for a funny, generous, warm, loving extended family.

Thursday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful for unexpected rolling bits of laughter.

April Fools Day

Colorado Springs. It is beautiful here. Cold I must say but I enjoy the cold weather. Not much done today except helping out my cousin. She is doing great. I took her to the food market and we made a TON of phone calls to her insurance company and she didn't even need to take a nap today. I however, would have done nicely with an afternoon nap. So over all, I'd say her progress is going quite well. She is so awesome. I wish I had half her positive spirit and outlook. Must find some somewhere...

Oh, I also need to play an April Fool's joke on my cousin. Hmmm, got any good ones?

Tuesday's Gratitude:
I am so grateful the dinner I made turned out well and my job here is successful.